Monday, March 27, 2006

Murder in a Small Town Church

The town of Selmer, Tenn., was shocked to discover that Matthew Winkler, minister at the Fourth Street Church of Christ who was known for his popular, straight-by-the-Bible sermons, was shot to death in a bedroom of the church’s parsonage.

But they were even more shocked to discover that Winkler had been killed by:

A) A gay couple that had just gotten married
B) A pregnant teenaged girl who didn’t want to ask her parent’s permission before getting an abortion
C) A pharmacist who sold the Plan B “morning after” contraceptive
D) A stem-cell researcher
E) An avid evolutionist
F) A sex education teacher
G) His wife and the mother of his three young daughters

G: Yes, sadly, Winker was killed by his wife, Mary, who has since confessed to the crime. Mary, who one congregant described as “adorable,” was also a substitute teacher at the local elementary school. Police have thus far released no motive for the crime…


At 10:33 AM, Blogger kevin beck said...

yep, the whole thing is very sad...all the way around. now the networks are refusing to run an ad by the United Church of Christ, no relation to the churches of Christ. Weird world.

At 3:47 PM, Blogger staunch atheist said...

If ever there has been a time to recognize that "Men of the cloth" are imperfect, it is now. Just ask the hundreds of thousands of alter boys that have been getting abused by priests for decades. We'll probably find out he was either fucking her sister or he beat the shit out of her. How ordinary is that? She can keep Clara Harris company. No relation to Jean of course.


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