Jesus Sez

Just in case you thought that Pat Robertson was the only high-profile Christian Conservative who had unconventional conversations with the Lord, comes the following dispatch from Florida.

The Rev. O’Neal Dozier of the Worldwide Christian Center in Pompano Beach, Florida recently told attendees of a Christian Family Coalition prayer breakfast in Miami:

“The Lord Jesus spoke to me and He said, ‘There’s something I want you to know…’”

So, what was it that Jesus took time out of his busy schedule to tell the Rev. Dozier?

A. That Terri Shivo wanted to thank the good people of Florida for their efforts to keep her alive
B. That He would punish the “wicked” people of South Beach with a Category 4 hurricane later this year
C. That Republican Charlie Crist would be the next governor of Florida
D. That the Supreme Court would outlaw abortion in 2007



ANSWER
C: Apparently keen on Florida gubernatorial politics, Jesus has assured the good reverend that Republican Charlie Crist would win the upcoming Florida election.

We’ll check back in November and see if the Son of God was telling the truth, or just pulling Rev. O’Neal’s leg.